Hi, I’m Serena Fordham, and this blog post is an extension of my Amazon Bestselling Book “ProspHER(ish): The diary of a fcuked up female-founder” written to help women succeed in their businesses and careers – while ultimately achieving their dreams and fullest potential.
Not the plan
This is not the blog post I planned to write. My alarm went off this morning, not with a gentle, melodic chime, but with the frantic barking of my two dogs at 3 a.m. One of those “it’s windy and therefore a cause for alarm” barks. A quick trip into the garden in the dark to let them out, a fruitless attempt to get them to quiet down, and then, just as quickly as it started, they were calm again. Me? Not so much. I didn’t get back to sleep.
My second alarm at 7 a.m. went off, and I was in that frustrating half-awake, half-asleep limbo. The morning was just getting started. My daughter, bless her heart, dropped a bomb: no clean school shirt. My husband wasn’t around, so I was the one to rummage through the laundry, frantically searching for a dryer sheet, only to find the clothes were still damp. My son, having seen his pre-made lunch, declared it inedible, so I had to slap together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in record time, which, of course, resulted in a sticky mess all over my hands.
From bad to worse
Then, the dog food bag broke. Spilling across the kitchen floor, it created a crunchy, oily mosaic. At least the dogs were happy, eagerly helping me “clean” it up. The final straw came when my son, on his way to school, fell off his bike. He came back in tears, with grazed knees and a broken chain. I spent a frantic few minutes trying to fix the bike, getting my hands covered in grease, and then comforting him, all while watching the clock tick past my departure time.
I was supposed to be on my way to London Tech Week at Olympia, ready to network and learn, but instead, I’m here, writing this, still in my pajamas, sipping a lukewarm cup of coffee. The FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is real, but so is the need to just take a breath and wallow in the chaos.
This is me
As a female founder and mum with a disability, things often don’t go to plan. And I’m willing to bet it’s the same for many of you. We see these polished photos online—the smiling faces at conferences, the perfectly styled outfits, the “I’m living my best life” posts. But what we don’t often see is the reality behind it all. The spilled coffee, the last-minute crises, the exhaustion that comes with juggling everything.
So, this is me, being fully transparent.
This is me, sharing a messy, frustrating, and very real morning. This is me, embracing the fact that sometimes, life doesn’t cooperate. And that’s okay. It’s a reminder that it’s perfectly fine to have a day where you do nothing but rest and recharge. There’s always next year for London Tech Week. For now, I’ll be here, scrolling through LinkedIn posts of everyone else enjoying the event, and I’ll be fine with that. I hope that by sharing this, you’ll know that you’re not alone on those days when everything seems to go wrong.
Share your story
Do you have a story like this where the day didn’t seem to go how you’d imagined it? Please share it with me here.
Hi, I’m Serena Fordham, and this blog post is an extension of my Amazon Bestselling Book “ProspHER(ish): The diary of a fcuked up female-founder” written to help women succeed in their businesses and careers – while ultimately achieving their dreams and fullest potential.
Focusing on others
As a woman in business it’s easy to get caught up in the comparison game. We scroll through social media, watch the highlight reels of others, and find ourselves asking those all-too-familiar questions: “Why aren’t I that successful?” “How come they get all the luck?” “Why does everyone seem to love them so much, when I’m over here struggling?”
I know I’ve been there. I remember being a quiet kid in school, watching the popular children from a distance, and wondering why I wasn’t like them. That feeling of being on the outside, of not quite belonging, is a heavy one. And the truth is, it doesn’t just disappear when you leave the school hallways. It can follow you into adulthood, into your career, and even into your personal life.
For years, I carried that same loneliness and self-doubt with me. I compared my journey as a writer and business leader to others, always feeling like I was falling short. The more I looked outward for validation, the more I felt I lacked. It was a vicious cycle of comparison and self-criticism that kept me from truly celebrating my own wins.
The shift to me
But a few years ago, something shifted for me. I had a moment of clarity that changed everything. I realized that the reason I felt like I was struggling wasn’t because of what anyone else had. It wasn’t about their success, their luck, or their popularity. It was because I wasn’t giving myself the love and respect I deserved.
I hadn’t celebrated my own achievements. I hadn’t fully embraced who I was—the good, the bad, and the beautifully imperfect. I was so focused on trying to be someone else’s version of “enough” that I had lost sight of my own. Once I started treating myself with kindness, once I started acknowledging my own strengths and accomplishments, something truly magical happened.
My “right people” started to appear in my life.
The old adage is true: “Your vibe attracts your tribe.” When you show up as your authentic self, you become a magnet for people who are on a similar wavelength. When you stop trying to fit into a mold that was never meant for you, you create space for genuine connections to flourish.
I started embracing all the quirky, beautiful parts of me. I’m a writer and an advocate for female success, yes, but I’m also newly disabled, a film fanatic, and a proud lover of giraffes. I’m a tea drinker and a wife to an amazing husband, and a mum to two children and two mischievous dachshunds. These are all parts of my story, and they are what make me, me.
And you know what? When I started sharing these truths, the community I had been searching for all along began to form around me. It wasn’t a group of people who were all exactly the same, but a crew of individuals who were all on their own journey to self-love and authenticity.
My invitation to you
So, if you’re reading this and you’ve ever felt like the quiet one, the outsider, or the person constantly comparing themselves, I want you to know that you are not alone. The greatest gift you can give yourself is to stop looking outward and start looking inward.
Embrace your authentic self, celebrate every single win, and give yourself the same love and grace you would give to a friend. Your tribe is waiting for you to show up, fully and completely, as yourself.
If this resonates with you, I’d love for you to reach out and introduce yourself to me here.
If you go on any streaming platform or social media site, it’s likely you’ll have across these three buzz words: self-care, growth, and well-being. But what do these terms actually mean?
They’re each valuable in their own right, but they are in many ways synonymous.
It’s easy to be overwhelmed with information and expectations of what it means to better ourselves, and that can make it quite hard to know if we are actually achieving it.
Let’s break it down.
Self Care
According to the NHS, ‘self-care is recommended when you have a minor condition which doesn’t normally need medical care’. I do not believe this to be true. We don’t (or at least shouldn’t!) wait until our cars are broken to get them serviced – vehicles need biannual check-ups.
Self-care is essentially exactly as it sounds: caring for yourself, just as you would a loved one.
It means to stay in tune with your emotions and needs, and to carve out time to ensure they are met and preserved.
Below are the 7 pillars of self-care:
Mental – are you stimulating your intellect?
Emotional – are you expressing your feelings and seeking support when needed?
Physical – are you exercising and fuelling your body?
Environmental – is your environment safe and harmonious?
Spiritual – this can look like: meditation, prayer, spending time in nature.
Professional – do you have a healthy work-life balance?
Social – do you feel connected to those around you? Are you indulging in fun and recreation?
Remember, this list is just a guide; self-care is individual and it important to tailor your self-care practices to your preferences and circumstances.
In my experience, investing at least an hour of self-care once a week is best effective and most sustainable.
Growth
Like self-care, growth is categorically individual – and it’s a harder to measure.
When I searched ‘How do we measure growth’, lots of unhelpful answers came up. Shout out specifically to those sites who advised me to take out a tape measure. Yes, sure, we can quantify growth by height, but I realised the only way we can truly measure growth is by comparison.
So, we created our comprehensive growth model, as follows:
Gratitude and Goals
Reflect
Observe
Wonder
Time
Herald
Gratitude and Goals
Start off by jotting down what you are grateful for in your life right now. This is nice to look back on, but also helps to ground you in the here and now.
Now that you’ve set the foundations of gratitude, note down your goals and give yourself something tangible to work towards – this is how you measure where you are and where you’d like to be.
Reflect
As I mentioned, growth is not possible without hindsight. Think back to where you were this time last week, last month, last year, and write it down. We change every day, and it’s important to monitor regularly and document so we can stay guided on the right path.
Observe
We live in such a beautiful world: Take a moment to notice all the pockets of growth happening around you – this could be the trees, your house plants, or your kiddos. Learn to appreciate and admire natural cycles and progression.
Wonder
Question everything! Well, not everything, that would be exhausting. But don’t be afraid to let your mind wonder – it’s important to have ‘stupid’ conversations (both with ourselves and others) as they are often a gateway to creativity, innovation, and new discoveries.
Time
Growth takes time; Rome wasn’t built in a day. Be patient and grateful for every new day.
Herald
Celebrate your growth and achievements! Alternatively, if you find yourself stuck in a rut, now is the time to seek advice and support from colleagues, friends, or loved ones; it is a valuable step in our shared journey of growth.
Wellbeing
Well-being is essentially the umbrella term for the aforementioned. It refers to your overall health and state of mind.
The most important aspects of well-being are balance and purpose. Are you managing stress? Do you have direction and passion?
This is where you need to rely on what your gut is telling you. Perhaps you really are happy, or perhaps something could change…
What’s the takeaway?
Self-care, growth, and well-being are integral components to our human experience – it’s not separate from us, and it’s certainly not separate from our career.
Be the best version of you by taking care of yourself, and your needs.
ProspHER can support you in evolving your story and progressing professionally with passion, purpose and power – find out how here.
This article was researched and written by Bronte Littlewood, Freelance writer at ProspHER.
We all want to live life to the fullest, and the good news is, we can! All it takes is just a few easy steps, and of course, knowing when to use the magic word…no.
Especially in early life and career, we are taught to seize every opportunity and say ‘yes!’ to everything. Which, admittedly, is a good thing – at least initially.
By saying ‘yes!’ to everything we open doors, networks, and moments of personal and professional growth that may not have been possible otherwise. Additionally, (and most importantly) saying ‘yes!’ is a great way of establishing our boundaries.
We each have differing levels of capacity. Some of us may be able to work late into the night and burn the midnight oil consistently, and yet still be able to wake up early, exercise, be productive at work, and do the same all over again.
Some of us, however, might be able to exclusively operate on 8 hours of sleep, and lack the mental and/or physical battery after a full day of work to extend ourselves late into the evening. Both circumstances – and all those in between – are completely normal, and vehemently individual.
We have to push our boundaries to recognise our limits. This is how we learn not only when to say no, but when we need to say no.
An important thing to know when navigating the work-life balance is when you work best
If you are one of those (lucky) ones that can function on barely any sleep and be productive all day long, congratulations, you are under the chronotype (a persons’ inclination for when they prefer to be asleep and awake) of dolphin, and you make up 10% of the population; typically creative and scatter brain, these individuals need to prioritise winding down before going to bed to avoid being kept awake by their thoughts.
15% of the population are lions: they are morning people and tend to be most productive between the hours of 6am and 11am.
If this is you, you may notice yourself needing a nap to stave off the afternoon crash!
The other 15% of the population are wolves.
These people function best at night, between the hours of 8pm and 2am.
They tend to need more than the average amount of sleep – which is totally fine and normal! Just because you are more productive at night does not mean you are any less productive.
Most of the population (55%) are bears, and their energy follows the sun. They can be productive all day and typically do not struggle to get enough sleep. The 9-5 workday is music to their ears!
So, now you know your chronotype, how does that help you to thrive in both work and life?
Great question! While it may be difficult for you to tailor your individual sleep proclivities to mandated working hours, having an awareness of when you are most energetic (and lethargic) is a great tool for you to know when to tackle those harder tasks, and be your most productive.
Knowing your personality type
Another great method to help you realise when to blow out that candle, is knowing your personality type. There are 16 different ones! – each are individual and contribute different strengths and weaknesses to work, and life.
For me personally, I am a Campaigner (ENFP-T), which means my strengths are curiosity, perceptivity, and enthusiasm, for example, and my weaknesses are people-pleasing, unfocused, and disorganised.
How has this helped me increase performance in my social and vocational occupations?
Well, I know that I am fuelled by passionate and meaningful work, and I need to monitor my boundaries when agreeing to take on new projects; I will often say yes without thinking and leave myself overwhelmed.
Knowing your personality type can help you exercise more control and engage more consciously with yourself and partnerships.
Achieving the work-life balance seems like an impossible task, and it does take work and constant monitoring. But, with these easy steps, you can start saying no to things that don’t fulfil you, and be the leader of your own, unique journey.
ProspHER can support you in evolving your story and progressing professionally with passion, purpose and power – find out how here.
This article was researched and written by Bronte Littlewood, Freelance writer at ProspHER.
You’ve had a long day at work; you come home to a messy house and enter a staring match with the dishes and laundry, but your mind is too clouded to even think about doing it – never mind actually doing it – because your to-do list for tomorrow is pulsing in your mind and everything feels chaotic and completely out of your control.
Sound familiar? If so, you may have reached burnout.
There are various reasons we get to experience burnout – everyone’s threshold for stress is different.
The reason I say, ‘get to experience’, is because in some ways, burnout can be a blessing: it teaches us that we have reached our limit, and that something in our life needs to change.
It is our body, and mind, signalling us to stop¸ take a deep breath, and reset.
‘It’s like driving a car in second gear on the motorway, you can do it, but there’s ultimately going to be some damage’
Dr Julie Smith, a licensed and practicing clinical psychologist, suggests we can detect burnout in ourselves by noticing these four signs:
You experience a disconnection from the people around you – this could involve arguing more with friends and family.
You are procrastinating to the extreme, for example, you are putting off even the smallest and most achievable tasks due to feeling overwhelmed by everything.
You abandon self-care – diet, sleep, exercise, and emotional check-ins go out the window.
Physical and emotional exhaustion can look like feeling really tired, but being unable to sleep.
Happiful is a YouTube channel dedicated to helping those struggling with mental health cope with their day-to-day lives. They interviewed Dr Julie Smith to ask her what to do when we get to the point of burnout, she offers this advice:
‘Take it seriously, as you would with other health issues’.
Ask yourself: what all the demands that I’m facing? Think about which of these stresses are in your control.
Take small breaks, off screens, to replenish. For example, ‘wonder off to your car, set a timer on your phone, and close your eyes for 10-minutes…we tend to fill all those gaps, those in between moments, with more stress…it’s about stepping back’.
‘Values check-in…write down the things that are important to you right now’
There’s no easy fix
Ultimately, there is no easy fix to turn burnout to bliss, it takes time and commitment to re-evaluate your workload, decision-making, and stress intake.
It is worth sitting down with yourself, and/or your superior, with these evaluations. Success is not sustainable during burnout.
What in your life can give? Do you need to cut down on social interactions to prioritise sleep and self-care? Do you need to remove yourself from a project at work? Do you need time off work to reset completely? Perhaps you are setting unrealistic expectations for yourself? Write down your observations to visualise them and notice patterns.
Some of us may actually invite burnout as an avoidant strategy – being so busy we physically don’t have the time to spend with our own thoughts. This is again, not sustainable, and if you are struggling with this avoidant strategy, it is worth speaking to a mental health professional for more directional and actionable support systems.
Only you can know what you need; you are the pioneer of your own ship. It’s okay to feel burnt out sometimes, but your fire will eventually extinguish from lacking the fuel and energy that it needs, and it is a lot harder to ignite ashes than embers.
Always be kind to yourself and look after your flame.
ProspHER can support you in evolving your story and progressing professionally with passion, purpose and power – find out how here.
This article was researched and written by Bronte Littlewood, Freelance writer at ProspHER.
There’s no singular handbook for navigating the business world, we can be educated, take advice, but most of our individual journeys are good ol’ trial and error.
Take the age-old saying, for example, you only learn to drive once you’ve passed your test.
But experienced drivers tend to pick up some bad habits – like not indicating – and business professionals tend to do the same.
Nobody is perfect: we change, our ideas change, and our perception of success changes as we grow.
Insights from successful women can help you reflect, and realign those values that motivated you in the first place.
So, what does success mean to you now? – yes, you!
According to Serena Williams, a high-achieving American tennis player: ‘The success of every woman should be the inspiration to another. We should raise each other up. Make sure you’re very courageous: be strong, be extremely kind, and above all be humble’.
Us women only got to where we are now by working together; the suffragettes set the precedent for women, but a positive trajectory was never guaranteed. The key to feminism is collective action and encouragement. We have to continue to grow with each other.
As a pioneer of collective action, Kate Welch OBE – Founder and Chief Executive of Social Enterprise Acumen and winner of the Queen’s Award 2016 – believes that success is ‘about making a real difference in the community’.
We had the privilege of interviewing Kate, and she shared with us her invaluable insights gained from over four decades in the business world.
2. Find your tribe
It’s easier to persevere, learn, and grow when you’re around people who are also on a similar journey to yours.
Our ProspHER community members have spoken about how the supportiveness of the community has truly helped them to feel as though they aren’t alone in what they’re going through, and that they’ll have support when needed.
And it’s true – being able to find a community of like-minded people to grow your network and learn from, be inspired by, and collaborate with, is one of the best ways to catalyse your success as a woman entrepreneur.
Being around people that are facing the same challenges and those that have the experience to help you navigate them and provide expertise is a fast-track way to feel more confident and assured in running your business.
What is one thing you wish you knew before you entered the business world?
‘Aha, that’s always a hard question…trust your instincts. Intuition comes from the experience you build up over time’.
What is one thing you wish you knew before you entered the business world?
‘There’s a point in which you reach certain stages of recognition. I’ve had experience as the only woman in a room before so I’m kind of used to being in that space, but the thing about being a woman, is you sometimes have to work harder to evidence or justify what you’re wanting to do. What we know for example is less investment goes to women. So being bold enough and strong enough but potentially feeling you might have to evidence your case more…In which case we build a strong evidence case. And mercifully use your contacts as well.’
What is one myth about the business world and how did you come to find it out?
‘That you can make a lot of money by doing very little – it’s the influencer, it’s the doing 15-minutes of fame. I once went to a lecture and they said, “I can easily show you how to make a million pounds, but if you do that you’ll probably upset a whole lot of people on the way and it’s unlikely you’ll make a second or a third or a fourth”. It’s nearly always a bubble that will burst’.
What are your biggest pieces of advice for professional women?
‘Find what you can be passionate about and follow that passion in such a way that – you can’t stop bad stuff happening but if you create the right vision. We use the hedgehog model: what are you passionate about? What can you be the best at doing? What is your resource engine to make that work? But overall, look after yourself: one of the best things for people’s mental health is actually giving back to society’.
To summarise:
Success is inherently relative, but inherently collective.
Trust your instincts and do what you can for the community.
Continue to reflect and remind yourself of your values.
We’d love to hear some advice from you – yes, you! – to share in our community. Please get in touch with your thoughts and help us to inspire and uplift women all over the world.
ProspHER can support you in evolving your story and progressing professionally with passion, purpose and power – find out how here
This article was researched and written by Bronte Littlewood, Freelance writer at ProspHER.
